Part Two Y'all

Title: Yo I Gotsta Read This Story; Part Two Y'all
Author: Perry
E-mail: icemulder@hotmail.com
Characters: Oz, ensemble
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy The Vampire Slayer, Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy Productions do. I also do not own Can't Hardly Wait's Kenny Fisher, but I honestly do not know who does. I'm sorry to whoever does own him,  I'm not playing for keeps, I only want to play with his words until the end of this story. I do not own We Are Family or Respect, Aretha Franklin owns Respect, but I don't know who owns We Are Family, someone other than me. I don't own Austin Powers either, Mike Myers does.
And on with the story, G!
Summary: Oz gets hit on the head, and suddenly can't control a thing he says. Everything that comes out of his mouth belongs to another. I Can't Hardly Wait to hear what you think of this story, if you know what I mean

Willow wasn't telling anyone what she was doing. She was supposed to be looking for books in the stacks, but instead she was performing a spell.

An hour long mind-reading spell.

She had taken some supplies out of Giles' private stash, a spell book, and a lock of Oz's hair.
This way she would only be able to read Oz's mind, because only Oz had the DNA in his hair.

Or so she thought.

Willow lit the various fragrance of love-scented candles and began her chant.
"The goddess of mind and power hath Lorenda, I summon thee.
Paths have been crossed
Doss have been dossed
I summon thee to grace my will with power
for 24th of a day, one hour
I will read one mind, one alone
This power only one has ever known
his hair marks the mind I grace and lorn
His name I call, Daniel Osborne
Into his mind I knock
I shall have his every thought"
Willow poured some of the crushed toad stone onto the small flame, and repeated the spell.
A purple flame raised into the air, and encircled Willow.
As it died down, she could hear something in her head.

Why did I just tell Buffy I was going to knock boots with some hos? What is wrong with me?

Willow can't be still mad. She has been gone long though. Uh-oh, what if she's planning revenge?

Xander sure seems happy about the way I can't speak. God his eye looks bad. Did he tell Willow who gave it to him?

Maybe he did. Maybe that's why she's mad!

Willow suddenly felt bad for Oz, so she hid her spell things, and called for him from the stacks.

Oz ran over to her "What up, G?" he asked.
That sounded good, it fit.  What's that smell? Oz sniffed the air.
She's been doing magic!
The anger in Oz's head startled Willow. She had never known he disapproved of her magic.
As she listened to his thoughts however, it seemed like he couldn't hate it more.

I wonder when I'll be able to talk normally. Maybe this is like a 48 hour thing. Or maybe---

What's going down, G?? I gots no clue what the hell I'm saying! This guys sweet an all, but whats eva i'm saying is scaring away all the bitches!

Willow raised her eyebrows in surprise, that wasn't Oz!

What's wrong with Will?

What's she talking 'bout? Stupid bitch, telling me I ain't good. I know I kick ass, yo.

"Oz," Willow looked at Oz, confused, "What are you thinking right now?"
What's wrong with you?
"What up G?" Oz seemed satisfied with his response. It was nothing like the offensive obscenities that were coming from the other voice in Willow's head.

But why were there two voices? She did the spell correctly, and she obviously couldn't hear anyone else thinking, only Oz and whoever this guy was.

You the man, Kenny.

Kenny, whoever this voice belonged to, his name was Kenny.
"Kenny," Willow said aloud, striking Oz's attention.

That's what I said earlier, I called myself Kenny!

"That's it! Whoever's voice you have, it's Kenny's! I'm hearing both of you right now!" Willow blurted. She blushed at the look on Oz's face, and explained herself, "I did a spell to hear your thoughts, so I could know what your thinking, and I'm hearing you, but I'm hearing some one else too. Kenny something."

So, you can here me right now?

"Yeah I can," the witch nodded, "I put in a lock of your hair, so it would only be you. So it would only be your DNA."

So this guy has my DNA, he looks like me?

"Maybe."

And he calls himself Kenny. And he's rude to women. He thinks he's black. Where is he though?

"Willow, Oz, I might have found something!" Giles called from the next room, "It says here that in some alternate dimension, or even in this same dimension, every one has a double, some one who looks exactly like them. Oz and his double--"
"Kenny."
"Okay, Kenny. Oz and his double Kenny must have switched places, or voices. There are some documented case of this. Some sort of spell, or physical injury could cause this, if perhaps it happened to both doubles at exactly the same point in time."

Like a blow to the head?

"Yeah Oz, a blow to the head. I guess if each of you hit your head at the exact same time, that could have happened," Willow didn't understand.

"He never said anything," Giles was confused, but just as Willow began to explain...

Like when I hit my head on the picnic table?

"That's it! Oz, you hit your head on the picnic table and immediately began to act so weird! Kenny must have hit his head at the exact same moment!!!" Willow clapped, "Okay, Oz, try not to think that much."

How am I gonna do that?

"Um, I don't know, just don't, okay, try to think simple, quiet thoughts. I'm going to try and hear what Kenny is thinking. Maybe then we can figure out where he is."

You are so smart.

"Thank you," Willow sat down on the floor, and listened to the voices in her head. Oz was concentrated on the song, We Are Family, so Willow wouldn't get confused between the two voices.

After 20 minutes, all she had learned was that Kenny was a prejudice pig who had just had sex and the girl wasn't happy. And Oz got teary whenever he heard Are We Family, so he switched to Respect.

Then Kenny began to talk about some party he was attending.

He began to go in depth about who was at this party, what is was like....

"But were is the party??"

Willow began to go into deep meditation mode. She listened intently to everything that went through Kenny's head.

*What's up with everybody? Why is these chicks so bitchy, yo?*

* What you want, Baby I got, What you need, Do you know I got it*

*Dude, everyone is so wasted*

*Hey baby (just a little bit) when you get home (just a little bit) mister (just a little bit)*

*Jesus, someone's gonna drop dat keg if they ain't careful!*

* All I'm asking is for a little respect when you come home (just a little bit) Baby (just a little bit) when you come home (just a little bit)*

*Shit! They is so drunk! They'd better watch out wit dat keg!*

* Ooo, your kisses Sweeter than honey, And guess what? So is my money *

* Shit, that'll hit me on the head if I don't move! Shit!*

*Just a little bit*

*MOVE PEEPS! MOVE OUTTA THE DAMN WAY!*

*R-E-S-P-E-C-T, Find out what it means to me*

*SHIT!*

Willow suddenly understood.

She grabbed the nearest book.

* Oh my god! Move!*

*R-E-*

*AAAH!*

*S-P-*

*Oh-*

*E-*

*MY-*

*C-*

*GOD- *  *T!*

"AAAAAAHH!" Oz screamed as Willow slammed the book on his head, knocking him out.

Willow slammed her hands over her ears as the spell wore off.

Giles watched her intensely, and Xander and Buffy were behind him, staring at the limp body of Oz, who was laying on the ground, with a huge gray bump forming on his forehead.

Very slowly, he woke up, the world slipping from black to light.

Finally he focused on everyone around him.

"'Sup," he said, rubbing his eyes.

Everyone groaned in disgust. It hadn't worked.

"I mean, what's going on? Will, why'd you hit me in the head?" Oz sat up, pleased with the surprised looks on everyone's faces.

"Oz? Is it really you? I mean, in my head, Kenny was about to have a keg dropped on his head, so I figured," Willow was talking fast, near hysterics.

"You did good. Nice reflexes," Oz stood up, stretching, "I like having control of my voice. Thanks you guys, and I'm so sorry!"

Giles and Buffy nodded their acceptance, and left the stacks. Willow nodded as well, and followed.

It was just Xander and Oz.

Xander had a nasty, swollen black eye.

"You okay man?"

"Yeah I'm good," Xander nodded, "Oz, is that your history notebook?" Xander pointed to a red notebook Oz had brought to the stacks.

"Oh, right," Oz bent down to get it.

Standing up, he slipped on the scattered, crushed toad stone, and crashed head first into one of the shelves.

"God, Oz, you are killing serious brain cells man!" Xander helped him up. He looked out of it for a few seconds, but soon came to.

He looked at Xander for a second, then shouted, "Get away from me, you lazy eyed psycho!"
                                                                        The End

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